How often do you talk when dating
It was worrisome at first, but I've tried to be more laid back about it like he is. And it turns out, it's actually been good for us, and also helped me to be a little more patient. I don't feel the need to self sabotage myself when I don't get new notifications from him. We make plans over text and then spend quality time together. We also have more things to talk about in person since we didn't talk about it to death over text. You sound like a great guy, and I definitely get where you're coming from, but I know how much it irritates me to have that sort of burden of making conversation while I'm at work put on me.
However, if I like someone, I love just hearing from them in a no obligations kind of way: And you're quite right haha, nobody with a soul would be upset by that! Im 35 and I'm a really bad texter, I even had to put a section on both OKC and Tinder about how I'll leave my phone at home at lot, it's always on silent, etc because so many guys got all pissy about the hours in between replying.
I'm just bad at owning a phone! That said, I like a phone calls. I was born in the 80s and I like talking to boys on the phone.
You can hear tone, laughter, and genuine answers to questions, infinitely better than silly texting!!! Sounds like you've been hard trained by your 2year relationship and you need to reassess how you want to be now. Texting didn't exist in its current form 10 years ago. People only started carrying phones around with then everywhere about 10 years before that. Some people never jumped on that train.
I wish the train had crashed and destroyed the track along with it. Texting is the perfect form of self-entitled communication.
I know you know I texted, so you are obligated to respond at some point. Life without the excuses of "I must have been out when you called" or "The cat must have knocked the phone off the hook" is just a little harder than it needs to be. I never apologize for not texting back right away. My phone is supposed to be convenient for me, not everyone else. Hey there, I see a lot of controversial answers here. I would just ask her if it bothers her if you text her too often. That she isn't much of a texter and is not good at keeping text-conversations going doesn't have to mean that she does not enjoy getting texts from you.
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Just texting her a couple of times throughout the week shouldn't do any harm, and won't make you look needy, only like you care. Good luck to you. I'm not trying to be mean, just realistic. This scenario sounds like she's just not that into you. I don't know your situation, but I just can't see her interest when you factor in that y'all have been on 5 dates and she's not interested in anything physical and not interested in texting you.
There are some people who simply see someone they're going on dates with as 'a way to pass the time' rather than a potential partner.
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I personally don't think it's a good idea to text a girl you're talking to for shits and giggles unless either y'all have known each other for a long time and have developed a rapport or if y'all have already been physical and have developed some kind of connection that way. Once again, really sorry if my comment comes off as rude, it is not my intention.
I just don't want you being too invested in what looks like a bad situation from my outside perspective. Maybe try limiting the texting to simple messages "Hey: Good morning" etc then do your own thing, perhaps turn the phone off or go in silent mode for a few hours to be unavailable.
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Hang out with your friends, take in a movie solo or with friends, etc. I get anxious about the communication stuff when I am dating - "Is she busy? She must be ghosting me. As you've said, she's 35 and has an aura of independence around her so maybe just give her space.
Flip the above feelings around onto her and make her want to hear from you. It may take some time, though. I wouldn't also recommend a good night text unless you've been texting throughout the day with her. Stick to "Good Morning" every other morning and see if she responds. Make plans with her for Friday or some time when you're well again, and put the phone down after the plans were confirmed.
My advice is to just try to control yourself and limit it to making plans. I'm seeing a girl casually now who I'm not really THAT into and we rarely text aside from making plans. Part of the reason is me not really being into it anymore, the other is that I'm just busy also I'm seeing other people. I've basically learned this from a prior casual thing where it ended because I was probably too clingy with the "checking in".
How often should you text/talk to someone you are dating?
All women are different though. I just wanted to say you're doing it exactly right. Absence makes the heart grow fonder? When people become too available they are no longer a challenge. Both men and women desire what they can not have.
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The trick is being available enough without overbearing. That line is always on a spectrum and I firmly believe the less available party dictates that line less attraction, more busy, there's always a pusher and a puller. I'd never suggest games, but yes, stay busy with life and eventually you're no longer able to be the clinger. My advice tho Jester, when you see her don't lead on the 'not that into you' vibe.
Still keep it fun. I'm trying to do that with all my dates but unfortunately, there are women who I get clingy with haha. Stop initiating texts before you chase her off. I date a couple of guys. Only one do I talk to every day and that's only bc he's funny. Even he gets on my nerves. When she texts me with something requiring an answer or if I need to exchange information easily conveyed over text. Pretty much the same I do with anyone. We started texting heavy because we met online.
We texted almost every day for about two months until we finally met each other. After we met each other and have hung out about five times our texting has died down a lot. But I keep reminding myself that 1. So that just leaves texting every now and then to Wish him a good day at work or good luck on a doc appointment if he mentioned it before hand.
Or something funny that reminds me of him. She does seem interested. Just more old school.