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Kind-hearted woman set up dating agency to help people with learning disabilities find love

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I enjoy organising some social activities and answering the helpline. I work from the heart. I feel I have grown up and am learning all the time and making the most of what Outsiders has to offer.


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Providing you are willing to get out there, you too can make the most of YOUR life. Now I am in a relationship with a gorgeous guy who I met though Outsiders. I am infinitely less lonely and see to have lost that dreadfully painful feeling of isolation altogether. Now I have met and made friends with a huge variety of people. I am moving into my own flat, leaving home for the first time at Immediately I was greeted with such warmth and enthusiasm, I knew it was a safe space and a group that I would love to be involved with.

Then life dealt me a few twists and turns. I had previously been in full health but something was changing, eventually I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome ME. Two years later, my symptoms mean that I am still unable to work and I most definitely would identify myself as someone with a disability.

It is only now that I think I can fully appreciate Outsiders in all its forms and meanings. Feeling part of a larger group has made a lot of difference. It is all too easy to feel isolated when you are suffering from a particular condition.

About Us – The Outsiders Club - Disabled Dating

Outsiders helps me feel connected to a wider group. The campaigning work of Outsiders is — to me — of crucial importance. So many people assume that disability equals no fun, no flirting and no sex.

It is very important that these assumptions are challenged and the wider life experience of disabled people is represented. After all, sexuality is a right not a privilege. Outsiders not only spreads the word on disability rights, but through the helpline, lending library and workshops it can help members to attain the knowledge and confidence to assert these rights and live the kind of life they, as adults, want to.

The club gave me the chance to be more adventurous in a friendly and supportive environment. I now have a job, a partner and a son. My advice to a new member would be twofold: With their help I can now enjoy pain-free intercourse.

Fresh kids, fresh style, fresh spirit

I feel this is the real down side of global capitalism: As long as the idea can be sold that desirability can be acquired by buying beauty products, slimming aids and plastic surgery, big business can continue to make huge profits and disabled people will continue to feel marginalised.

This made it impossible to travel. But, having made it all the way to visit another member, the delightful Ruth, I was inspired to travel to Northampton for the medical for my pension infirmity benefit application.


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Ruth sadly passed away but I still enjoy my pension. Outsiders has helped me in many other ways. It felt really good just to be accepted. Where there are people I can trust sufficiently, with with whom, since they acknowledge my sexuality as a matter of course, I can speak frankly and expect from them a response which will be of use. Other organisations dealing with the problems of disabled people and books which serve to highlight the sexual problems may bring awareness, but they often shy away from doing more than raising expectations in what is little more than a clinical vacuum.

Thus, the Club serves as an over-all enhancement. Not a lot of people would do that, since disabled people are discriminated against. We have always got on very well and love each other very much. Whatever anyone disabled or disadvantaged can do to improve the quality of their lives, they should try to do. I appreciate that the Outsiders is trying to help us all do that.

Outsiders Helpline The Club helpline is run by Janet from 2 — 7pm weekdays. This contact with members and their worries and difficulties gives Janet a grip on the dynamics of the club. She runs a very personal service and nobody has ever complained about this service. The Helpline can also be accessed by email. Discussions We hold discussions on topics of relevance to our members that seem to be holding them back. The Outsiders demo on Westminster Bridge was incredible and our aim is to encourage society to view disabled people as sexual beings with the same desires and needs as everybody else.

Events All our events are in lovely accessible venues and run by experienced volunteers, who will welcome you and introduce you to the others. You are expected to pay for your own drinks and food, but otherwise it is free. We prefer newcomers who have attended a couple or more lunches to actually join our club. Shy people will be encouraged but not pushed and visually impaired people offered support. We expect people who need feeding etc. Anybody can come to our events to see what we are up to although the events only reflect one aspect of our club.

Details of the lunches and Jamboree are giving in the Events section. We entertained ourselves with delicious morsels to eat, a Tactile Fashion Show, belly dancing and massage in the sunshine. This remarkable experimental art event was televised by SexTV Toronto, one of the best TV programmes made about us at that time.